Diabetes and me.

That's my sister with the face like the kid from Mask. We took pictures for about an hour the other day. We don't need friends.

I’m sitting here at 12:21 a.m. because my dog is having a complete nervous meltdown on my bed over the storm outside. I have never seen a dog shake like this before. I’m kind of scared she may give herself a heart attack. As we know, my hypochondria extends to every aspect of my life. I’m going to write a book about my OMG IM SICK WITH EVERYTHING-ness called “This Will Be The Day That I Die.” Just as soon as I do 50 days of working out.

So, never.

This past week, I’ve been more and more convinced that I have diabetes. I went out with my parents on Saturday. I ate chocolate cake and then proceeded to go Mothers’ Day shopping while they went to pick up our dog from the groomers. While I was at my first stop, I nearly fainted (meaning I was slightly lightheaded.)

By the time I got out of my second stop and back to the car, I decided it would be a good thing to Google “High Blood Sugar Symptoms” and, of course, I fit all of them. My next course of action was to sit in the car and try to catch my breath, take my pulse, and all that, followed by another Google search for “How to lower blood sugar quickly.” My first result said to either jog really quick or drink a ton of water or unsweetened tea as soon as possible.

I was right next to Starbucks, so I ordered my usual Venti-Unsweetened-No-Water-Green-Tea-With-Light-Ice.

Bastards put classic syrup in it.

I scurried on home before I went into diabetic shock or a coma or whatever happens to you. I even pulled over once because I thought I was going to pass out.

When I finally got home, I asked my grandma if I she could check my blood sugar for me since my pap has diabetes and has a fancy gadget for that. (This is probably going to end up being my new I NEED TO CHECK MY BLOOD PRESSURE STAT!!!!)

After stomping my feet and freaking out over having to poke myself with a sharp object, I did it. I checked my blood sugar and had the most terrifying result ever.

It was well within the high-normal range, even after eating.

I’m fucking crazy, I swear.

I had been giving myself a panic attack all day about it. I’ve pretty much done it every time I’ve eaten anything sweet since then. I’m a lunatic and I should probably be committed somewhere.

In other news, I’m currently reading a book about a fat girl who had gastric-bypass. It’s making me lean more and more towards the Lap-Band.  Which I probably won’t do because I’d feel like a big cheat and all that.

My plan was to go to bed an hour and a half ago so I could wake up and walk before work. We’re for reals about to have a week of no rain (during the day, at least). We so excited.

Also, my baby sister is buying us a pool. She has zero debt and wants to build up her credit without getting a credit card, so she’s getting a small-ish loan (smaller than any of my student loans, fer sher) from the credit union where she’s been saving her money since she was like two, buying us a pool, and building up her credit all at the same time. A very nice pool, at that. I’m never ever moving away from home.

Okay. I think I need to sleep now. I should probably start blogging more often just because I need somewhere to get my feelings (I don’t even go here) out.

I’m also considering a switch from WordPress to Blogspot in the future. We’ll see.

Goodnight, non-spambot readers.

6 thoughts on “Diabetes and me.

  1. So, I think it is safe to assume that you meant that your blood sugar is “well ABOVE the high normal range”? I had a recent scare like that, with a fasting AM blood sugar of 101. I tested it (my wife is a diabetic) just to prove I didn’t have a problem. The first morning it was 134! I just about had a heart attack. But I had just done a stress test because I thought I had chest pain while Mountain Biking. My heart was fine, of course. But no so much my blood sugar.

    I stopped eating after 7 PM, not drinking beer either. I walked and biked regularly. It took two months but improved to normal. But i recently read Gary Taubs “Why We Get Fat: And What To Do About It”. Basically turned me into a NO CARBS evangelist. Sugar=Poison.

    1. Nope. I actually meant to say it’s well WITHIN the high-normal range. ha.

      Not eating after 7 would kill me. That’s what time my shift is over.

  2. So I discovered your blog yesterday searching for reviews of Ripped in 30. I f*cking love it and have read your last 99999 posts in one sitting. I just wanted to tell you that.

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