That’s gonna be me real soon here. Our pool is finally in. They got the steps and ladder up while I was at work. I’ve got a pretty little bathing suit and I really don’t care how big I am in it.
I’ve wanted a pool since I was 5. Sucks that it has to be 20 years later when I’m a total loser still living at home, but I’m not one to complain.
I think we may have a slight problem, though.
According to my sister, who weighs about 90 pounds less than me, the ladder is fucked. Meaning it feels like it’s buckling under her weight. She said she felt like she had to jump in the pool then take a nice flight back to the ground from near the top of the ladder.
Either she’s exaggerating (My sister? Exaggerate? That’s not in our blood!) or I’m in for a proper ass bruise when I hit dirt getting out of it tomorrow.
True story: One of my biggest fears is crushing something because of my weight. When I was 4 or so, my mom hosted a jewelry party (or make up party or kitchen apparatus party) and there was a rather large woman out on our deck, sitting on a wooden bench (maybe it was a picnic table? I forget.) My poor little black kitten was under the picnic table.
The lady was on top of the kitten.
The kitten was full of anxiety and white fur until her dying day.
I didn’t have a bit of fat on me at that point and I was scared of crushing things.
So, yeah, there’s a story.
I’ve very obviously been absent from blogging. I’m still trying to get my shit together, still captioning shows, still addicted to cheese sticks. I’m trying to lay off the typing so much when I’m not at work because my hands KILL me. Like, I seriously had to go to the bathroom and run them under cold water for a couple minutes today. I don’t know if it’s my keyboard or what it is, but damn.
Anyway, here’s from my draft file of quotes. If you’re reading this via a feed reader or a subscription, you probably got a peek at part of my quotes page because I accidentally published it like a week ago. Oh well.
This completely sums up how I feel right now.
“Apologies should be saved for worthy occasions, like hurting someone’s feelings or using your roommate’s toothbrush on accident—not for existing. Life is too short. You can hate your body for all kinds of reasons; it’s a battle and a choice, to accept and embrace, or reject and hate. I know it’s more complicated than that, but to simplify things that’s how I feel, and right now I’m having fun!” — Beth Ditto