I’m going to be a derby girl one day. My name is going to be Murdercai, after a certain bird on a certain show I will call The Usual Program.
The only obstacle I have in my way?
I have no clue how to skate and when I try, I completely freeze up and just kind of shuffle my feet.
So it goes.
I owe the Angel City Derby Girls a big apology. I was supposed to review this almost a year ago and never got around to it. I have an excuse, of course.
I have never been physically strong enough to do the entire workout in one sitting. Not until tonight, anyway. Either they’re putting steroids in the air at work or I am actually more in shape than I was when I got the video. I’m not sure yet.
But I did it. I did the whole damn thing. I can honestly say that not even the Jillian Michaels dvds make me sweat like this one did. It was nuts.
The workout is broken down into five parts: A warm up, core, legs, butt, and “off skates,” which is basically cardio. Each section is led by a different derby girl. Oh, and the music is fantastic. Half of the songs on there have been on the official C’mon Fatso workout playlist for quite some time.
My favorite warm up is the stripper stretch. That is probably the most uncomfortable I have ever been, but at the same time, it was kind of relaxing. I don’t stretch enough, especially since I started this job (Almost 8 months ago. Holy crap.)
Abs. Well. I did that section about an hour ago and they’re still burning. There’s a lot of moves that require lying on your back and lifting your legs. This is where I used to always quit. I weigh roughly 300 pounds. I carry most of my weight in my bum and legs. I would wager that both of my legs put together weigh about 150, if not more. That’s a lot of weight to keep lifting up. But, hey, I did it. I did all of them. And Biodiesel is my favorite of the girls just because I have some serious hair envy.
Legs are next up. I did like 10 minutes of one of Bob Harper’s Inside Out workouts for my legs the other day. Like, Friday. My bum is still sore from that. For real. This workout is killer. I won’t lie, though. I sped through them just so I could have a second to breathe while they caught up to me. haha. Still a lot of leg lifting. This is where I kind of just got in a zone and stopped thinking about how near death I am.
The bum section was a little rough, just because I’m still sore from the other day. This is also where my Baileykins started mistaking my shadow for a toy. It was pretty cute, and I did get distracted and didn’t put in as much effort into this one. She also wanted to show me that she totally knows how to roll over. She just didn’t want to do it when my friends were here.
The last section was slightly confusing to me. I wasn’t sure if it was a cardio section or a cool-down section. I took it as cardio and went hard. By hard, I mean gasping for air. Lots of toe taps and fancy footwork kind of stuff. The last move was the only one I sat out on. It’s a little skippy box step thing. If I do that, I will send the ceiling fan in the room below me crashing to the floor. Can’t be having that.
Overall, I really loved this workout. I still can’t believe I actually got through it. It’s no joke. Maybe one day I’ll take out my cutesy purple skates and try again.
Probably not, though. I’ll just stick with the dvd.