I’m in the biggest writing funk right now. It’s weird. I have so much stuff to talk about, but I just keep opening up this little box and not really doing anything.
I changed the theme/design of the blog, but I’m not feeling it. I should probably just upgrade my WordPress account because I hate all of the pre-made themes here and my CSS skills are a bit rusty without any use. And I need to figure out a button because I keep getting asked for them/to do button swaps and I am so designed challenged. It’s sad.
That’s not even important. I was just violently reminded of what is important.
I got my permanent caps on my teeth last Monday. Tuesday was fine. Wednesday was fine. Thursday was fine. Friday, I took a drink of water and it felt like someone shot me in the face. I’m going in tomorrow at 9:00 a.m. to see what’s wrong. The last three days have been absolute torture. The only water I can drink is on the warm side of lukewarm. I can’t bite into anything. Nada. It’s awful. I just accidentally clicked my bottom tooth on the bad tooth and I was reminded that there are more pressing issues than my design skills. Ugh.
I also met with my PCP about the seven-month supervised diet part for surgery. She’s insisting on 1,200 calories and actually suggested P90x, which I almost find insulting. It hasn’t been fun. I hate diets. Hate hate hate hate hate. I’ve been miserable for two weeks. I bought Hungry Girl’s “300 Under 300″ book and everything tastes like cardboard. I’ve been drinking Carnation Instant Breakfast or Special K protein shakes for just about every meal since Friday, though. Chewing is absolutely out of the question until this tooth gets fixed. Except I did have an apple dumpling at the Apple Festival today. I will sacrifice my tooth for those.
My only goal for the seven months is not to gain weight. Maintain or lose. I have this intense fear of gaining weight. I feel like I’m going to get an eating disorder or something. I’m also still uncomfortable with the “durrr I hate liberals and bring my guns everywhere!” idiots from the cult who go to my gym at the same time I do. I’ve never run into them. We seem to miss each other when I actually go, which isn’t often. Some guy gave me the biggest stink eye the other night because I was too close to the machine he was using as a beanbag chair or something. It’s intimidating being in a gym in the middle of the night with just guys and gun-toting teabaggers.
Also, both Doctor Who and Glee have completely trampled on my heart in the past two weeks.
How much can I possibly whine in one blog? Geez.
Looking on the bright side of life:
1. I started crocheting again and my blanket I’ve been working on since, oh, 2010 is finally big enough to nap with. I also have a bag of about 25 granny squares and a ton of new yarn to finish another blanket.
2. I really do have the absolute best friends in the world, even if I don’t see them often enough.
3. I don’t hate my job. Captioning can be really tedious and super-negative coworkers can be day-ruiners, but I love that I provide a service for people who really need and appreciate it. And sometimes I get to caption really good things. I’d be lying if I said Oprah hasn’t made me cry. In the past week.
4. I’ve been going to the same church since June and I can’t count one time anything has made me cringe there. I love the people there to bits. It’s so refreshing to be in a church that loves people and not just because they have to. I found a notebook the other day from when I was first sketching out stories from the cult and I said something like, “I don’t even know why I’m writing this. I don’t have any resolve to my story and I don’t think I ever will.” I can admit when I’m wrong.
5. I’ve started a new book collection: >1960s etiquette/social guides. I found a dancing manual from 1942 at Half Price Books yesterday, along with a 1963 (I think) Seventeen magazine etiquette guide for teenage girls. My crazy eschatology book collection isn’t getting enough attention because of this.
6. Speaking of books, I found a copy of “A Wrinkle In Time” with the exact same cover as I had when I was in grade school! It was just a really good book day yesterday.
7. It’s October, which means it’s almost Halloween, which means Hocus Pocus and GISHWHES (Team Ravenclaw wants YOU) and pumpkin cupcakes and everything I love. I’ll take this whole month over the winter holiday season anytime.
8. My Vicodin kicked in and I don’t feel like I want to tear my tooth out with ice skate! Hooray!
I miss you, blog. We should get together more often. Here’s a picture of Cas that one time he was stoned. (SPOILERS!)